4/8/08

I don't know what the relationship is between L and F. They're both from the same kingdom, but from two completely different classes, different trainings, missions, although ultimately they both care about Jaxter, the fate of the new kingdom of Oro and also they each in their own way care about Henrietta. Any conflict, attract or repel between them? They are also at least 8 years apart. She's a mature 13 year old, and he a mature 22 year old. Okay, after completing GMC charts for the to, I've come to a conclusion. Whew! You'll see it when you read it.

4/9/08

Another day. Another desire to get moving. And yet, and yet. Something feels like it's in the way. Is it the desire to be doing anything but this? No. It's that my mind wants to dive into a now word land, but I need my words. You know what? I'm just going to look at my words, and give myself no pressure about actually using any of them to tell the story I want to tell. I'll let the story tell me what it wants and needs.

BTW, while I've been diligently working on my fiction I haven't been journal writing. I'd like to give that to myself son, along with some calming meditation.

4/10/08

I couldn't sleep last night on account of the copious amounts of tea I consumed at the restaurant. I didn't check to see what kind of tea it as. Evidently, it was caffeinated. Hence, my inability to sleep last night. I think I finally fell asleep for real, not that fitful stuff, after E left for work. That was after 6:30am.Oi! So, here it is, 12:22pm, and I'm just getting started. This week I've given myself the luxury of working on my novel daily, and with pretty much an open-ended time frame. Ok, except for Monday, but that was different because I was writing just before a meeting. When I didn't have a meeting, yesterday and the day before I let myself write as much as I wanted to ,pretty much. Well, I want to do the same today, but I set in my calendar that In would do office admin, bills, and especially answering emails that I've let sit since Monday. Oi. Ok. Here's the deal. Let's blow up, figuratively ,in my head, that schedule. And let my self write as much as I want. I know I will do those other things. Including a walk, which I have not given myself, since starting at my writing first thing. Hmmm. I tell myself I have no time, because by the time I'm done writing, my brain wants to keep going and do other work. That's why walking first thing was so good; I got it out of the way, and gave myself time to slid gently into mental wakefulness. I don't know. I like getting to my writing first thing, after breakfast. It allows me to move forward at a much faster rate than if I squish writing my novel in beteen other activities. Ok, here's the deal. I need to take a gentle walk. So, why don't I put that intention out there and release it. It will come back tome, if it's meant to be. And for all of you out there, who think this is mumbo jumbo, not my problem. I do what works for me. You do the same. See you!

4/14/08
The writer is sad; and so are the other parts of me. I’m on BART, and I’m just sad. Sad that the story isn’t further along; sad that I haven’t sent off any submissions in who knows how long. I could check but that would take me away from what I’m doing; sad that I’m sad. Just sad. Can we go on/. Isn’t there anything else to talk about? Well, there’s the story that I’m working on. Yah, that. I want to turn it into something wonderful. Friendship, PS said, is my theme. Based on John Lescroart’s talk on Saturday where he talked about theme, among other things. In a wonderfully meandering way. I want go into my bio, he said. And then proceeded to do so. It was worth it. His hard-knock life shows us that perseverance is key. Hear that? Yah. So do the work and work on the theme. Which is?

4/16/08
Self-consciousness. Maybe I should read what I'm posting here. Nah! Dora Wolfe is talking. She's brash, rash, and itching with something to say. And what is that something? It's about passion, adventure, the pain of growth, the worse pain of doing nothing. Henrietta has got to succeed. Or else, right? I need to talk to her. So, after this post I'm diving into a short chat with her.

How do I dive into my story? Today, I'm not sure. I plan to circle and sift through my outline, thinking it through as I type my napkin scribbles. Am I procrastinating? I don't think so. I need to see the big picture before I dive into the nitty-gritty of actual writing the scenes. For the scenes to have power, I need to be clear in my character's underlying motivation. I also need to know what she's up against. Hence the planning. Alright! Here I go!